- Chinese title: 小黑貓不想被剪蛋蛋
- Author : Cheng-Yao, Sha (Kumoyama)
- Publisher: A Book A Year
- Publication date: July 16, 2024
- Edition: 1st
- Language : Traditional Chinese
- Print length: 320 pages
- ISBN: 9789869736626
- Genre: Novel, Fiction, Animal Writing
- Style: Humor, Heart Warming
- Recommend : adult/ teen reader
- Contact: https://ip.taicca.tw/ip/show.do?ip_id=1985
Chapter 1, Translated by Grace Najmulski (GNaj)
https://gnajtranslation.weebly.com/
1
The little black cat understood he'd been left to the dark.He didn't need to open his eyes to know he'd been abandoned.
Because of his innate ability to sense the world's many sounds and smells, the little black cat—still too young to open his eyes or eat solid food—could tell where he was. His eyes were just there for support.
Around him was nothing but overwhelming darkness.
No familiar heartbeats from his siblings; no mother's warm scent.
The little black cat immediately knew it wasn't he who carried the dark.
It was the darkness that carried him.
Suddenly, there came the sound of distant heavy rain—how distant, he didn't know. The pounding of raindrops striking the ground let him know the dark was closing in. The dark sucked away what little warmth the ground held, and with it the kitten's own meager warmth.
In the roar of the rain, the little black cat couldn't smell its surroundings and didn't know where to go. This was the first time in its life that the little kitten became self-aware. It was also the first time that this "self" was confronted by the shock and fear of abandonment.
His instincts told him to tremble, but it was all he could do to stay standing on his tiny legs.
The rain and darkness reached out and seized the little black cat with their icy claws, wringing the strength and warmth from his body. The dark squirmed its way into the kitten's heart, pushing all thoughts from its mind.
In that moment it became clear to the little kitten that the rain and the dark would flatten and squash its tiny body into nothing. Yet at the same time, the rain and dark continued pouring fear and panic into his body. It wasn't long before the kitten's tiny body was so full that a sound even more heartbreaking than the rain and dark poured from the deepest depths of its stomach.
MEEEEEAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!
The little black cat knew he was being drained of something large and important. That those icy claws were sapping him of whatever would let him keep his life as a kitten.
And it emerged as a drawn out, piercing howl.
Myaaaa! Myaaaaaa! Not even the rain and dark could drown out his bloodcurdling cries.
He didn't know how he'd managed to make such a frightening sound, but he knew that the dark's grip grew stronger with each shriek. The dark and fear would eat away at him until they finally became one.
This bloodcurdling Myaaaa! was just a part of that process.
As he continued his non-stop cries, the little black cat felt himself transforming into some flattened, dried-out thing. The very thing that made him a cat trailed behind his shrieks, squeezed from his body. He would continue his transformation into a non-cat until he could cry no more, and then he would cease to be even a non-cat.
He'd already grown so used to his own cries that he could no longer tell if he was still crying when it happened. A large and unfamiliar warmth fished his completely numbed body out of the darkness.
It hurried him far away from that place, taking him somewhere big and sheltered.
“Is it okay for you to go around picking up stray kittens like this? What if its mom comes back to look for it?”
“Would it be fine if I said I brought him back after waiting to see if his mom came back?”
Only later did the little black cat understand that he'd been rescued by something called a "human."
And that he'd been utterly, and truly, abandoned.
2
Adjusting to life with the humans was by no means easy.
They took him to the doctor first. There they took all sorts of uncomfortable tests and even gave him a bitter medicine for tummy parasites.
He threw up every day. It was so much that he thought he would turn into a shriveled non-cat.
The humans always picked him up when this happened, sticking a thin plastic tube down his throat and making him want to vomit even more. The tube went all the way to his stomach, pouring the watery formula straight into his belly. He really hated being fed this way because he didn't feel like he'd actually eaten, but the little kitten knew he was toast if he didn't let the humans feed him this way.
It wouldn't take much of anything for his health to worsen after nearly being crushed by the dark. He was toast if he didn't eat; toast if he didn't sleep; toast if he didn't get any sun; toast if he didn't get any exercise.
Toast if he ate himself sick.
Toast if he got sick from too much sun.
Toast if he slept too long and forgot to breath.
Toast if he overworked himself.
Despite being so close to death, the humans put their all into taking care of him.
And then one day, the little black cat found he could open his eyes.
Reflected in the eyes of a human, this was his first time seeing himself.
The Little Black Cat (小黑貓)
A dull, black husk. Other cats would see his sorry state and think he was as good as dead. The two humans that had fished him out of the darkness had even taken to calling him "Toast." Even he thought he looked pretty toasted, but there was no way of knowing if that was why he'd been abandoned.
Could it have been because he'd spent all his time tucked against his mother's warm belly after he was born? Was it because he couldn't squirm around like his siblings? Did it have to do with his body? Was it so dark that his mother had abandoned him because she thought the dark had already taken him?
He had no way of knowing. What the little black cat did know this: he did not like meowing.
Although no one had told him so, he felt that cats weren't supposed to meow.
Even if the sound of his voice delighted his mother and the humans, the little kitten felt as if all the heat would leave his body when he meowed, and he didn't want to lose what little body heat he had to make a pointless noise.
He was also worried the crushing dark would return for him if he made too much noise.
So he didn't make a sound.
Aside from when he wanted food or got his shot, the little black cat absolutely refused to make a sound.
3
Time passed and the little kitten grew.
He grew big enough that the humans let him explore the rest of the house.
Stepping outside his room, the little black cat caught the scent of two other cats.
The humans called them Swish and Chonk, but Swish didn't have much of a tail to swish and the only Chonk thing about Chonk was his belly.
“You're the newbie ain'tcha, Toast?”
Swish flicked his stump of a tail, lowering himself to the kitten's level so as not to scare him. But the little black cat thought Swish was getting ready to pounce and didn't dare lower his guard. He arched his back, ready to run.
“Yeah, but I'm not Toast. I'm a black cat.”
“Doesn't matter what you think. Just matters that we'll be family after this. Please treat me kindly.”
Chonk, who was more than used to caring for stray kittens, flopped down beside the little black cat.
His belly radiated such wonderful warmth. Mistaking this warmth for his mother, the little cat instinctively let out a thin meow as if it was a kitten again.
Feeling as his body heat quietly escaped through his open mouth, the little cat swallowed the ow.
“Hm? An odd kitty, this one. Why won't you meow?”
Swish's eyes widened and the little kitten couldn't tell whether he was happy or mad, but Swish's scent hadn't changed, so he must have just been curious.
“It makes me cold. And when I'm cold the dark can get me.”
“You're saying some weird stuff. I don't get it.”
Chonk shifted his big belly so the little black cat could cuddle closer to his warmth.
“If you're cold, you can just snuggle into my tummy. It's no problem.”
“Don't mind him, Toast.” Said Swish. “Chonk just wants to cool his belly down.”
“You're always playing tricks on the young'uns, Swish.”
“What's that got to do with this? Anyways, I usually wait until after we've become family.”
“So you can only really start on your games after becoming family.”
The little cat could tell from their voices and scents that these two senior cats got on well, but couldn't understand what they meant by "family."
“Family means being like us—losing your pearls.”
Swish moved his stub of a tail aside so Toast could better see the space between his legs. Chonk exposed his warm belly to show his own flat, smooth rump.
The little black cat gave it a little sniff before sticking out his tongue for a taste.
Despite the area having virtually no scent, he could smell and taste that there had once been something between the two senior cats' legs.
Toast stretched to lick the space between his own legs.
There was no mistaking it, that strong scent that separated him from other cats. The smell may not have been obvious due to his age, but it would grow stronger over the years.
“What are these?” The little black cat asked.
“Purrrrls.”
“Purls nyaa.”
Chonk and Swish licked the area he'd sniffed.
“But we don't have them anymore.”
“They were cut off and that was it nyan.”
“They're gone? Cut off?”
Toast couldn't make any sense of Chonk and Swish's explanation. But what the little black cat did know was that as far as pearls were concerned, he was different from these senior cats.
“Because mew you have to get them cut if you're going to live with humans.”
“Relax nyaa, after you get them cut, we can be a family.”
“Why do you have to get them cut to be family?” The little black cat asked, perplexed.
“Because as far as humans are concerned, we don't need purrrrls.” Answered Swish.
But the little cat still had his doubts.
“So, we don't need them?”
Chonk looked towards the ceiling somewhere in the distance and scratched at the doorway.
Toast could tell that Chonk didn't really want to answer his question, but that he also felt it would be wrong to ignore it. The little cat could feel how much Chonk wanted him to be part of the family, and that Swish felt the same.
There was a shift in Chonk's scent. It seemed like he’d made up his mind to tell the little cat the truth.
“We need our purls mrow.”
Swish's smell changed to match Chonk's. It appeared as though the two senior cats didn’t intend to hide anything from him. After all, they’d be family once he got lost his purls, and real family gave real answers.
“You can't have kittens without purls mow, that's why they're important.”
Swish picked up where Chonk left off.
“Actually, I thought about it and it's such a waste that a cat as purrfect as me has no purls to have my own kittens nya.”
Now it was Chonk's turn to chime in.
“Even I've thought about it. It's for the humans that a cat as smeowrt as me doesn’t have purls to have my own kittens.”
“But,” the two cats said in unison, “you have to get them cut if you want to be part of the family.”
“But why do we have to be part of the family?” Toast persisted, still unconvinced.
“Because humans will only wait upon you once you're family.”
“Plus you can lounge around inside all day. Doesn't that sound nice?”
That's where Chonk and Swish ended their case, because treat time had arrived!
Swish (長長)
One of the humans opened a tube of treat food. Swish and Chonk stuck to the human's legs and followed them into the living room. There, happy and content, they lapped up the food the human squeezed from the tube.
“What's wrong Toast? Don't you want a treat?”
The human lifted the little black cat to its chest, using the same warm hands that had fished him out of the darkness, and carried him into the living room.
Despite already being used to this human's warmth and scent, and despite having no objection to the delicious smelling treat in their hands, the little cat couldn't help thinking that as much as he liked being waited on by humans, he still preferred to feed himself.
And he much preferred leaping over lounging.
Chonk (寬寬)
But most importantly—
He would have to give up something important to become part of their family.
Isn't there something off about this?
The little black cat wasn't quite sure what about it felt wrong, but it set him on edge. He was so tense that when the human softly touched the spot between his legs he took off, leaving a cloud of fur.
“What's wrong, Toast? You don't like it when I touch your balls?”
The little cat had no way of responding to the human's question.
And he had no way of addressing his own doubts.
4
More time passed and the little black cat had grown considerably larger.
When the humans took him to the vet for a checkup, the vet examined him on top of the stainless-steel exam table and expressed his approval of how much he'd grown.
The little cat listened to the humans' conversation.
“So should we go ahead and get him neutered today?”
“If you think it's okay, then yes. I heard it's better to get them neutered early because they're less likely to develop health issues down the line.”
“The younger they are the easier it will be for them to adjust, since their body won't remember what it felt like to have testicles.”
“Then let's do it today.”
“Neuter” came up three times, and the little black cat could tell from the vet's scent that he was about to be taken into the back. Was this neutering the thing Swish and Chonk had mentioned? Was this all part of becoming a family?
The kittens locked in the cages awaiting examination began to stir up a fuss.
“You're dead.” The kittens yowled. “Done for. You'll never be a real cat once they're cut!”
Even after repeatedly telling himself to ignore them, the little black cat couldn't help but worry.
Though the vet picked him up with a practiced hand, the little cat still felt anxious.
He knew this feeling well. It was as familiar as the moment he realized he'd been abandoned. Lights flooded the building along with the smells of various medicines, antiseptics, and unfamiliar animals. And still, even in the vet's steady grip, the little cat could feel as the dark that had nearly consumed him reach out its icy claws once more.
He used to be a scrawny milk kitten that would be easily crushed by those icy claws, but he'd grown since then. He'd eaten both wet and dry food. He would not be crushed so easily!
And he was filled with resilience.
The little black cat suddenly broke free from the vet's hold, bounding off the wall before flying through the open automatic doors.
“Oh no! Grab that cat!”
“Toast! Where are you going? Toast!”
He'd heard the vet and human and could tell from their scent that they were genuinely worried, but the black cat didn't look back as he fled the building.
Did he really want to be part of that human's family, together with Swish and Chonk?
No.
But he also knew that if not for that human's warm hands lifting him from the darkness he wouldn't be here right now, and he never would have grown into an adult cat.
However, there was one thing he couldn't understand. No matter how much he thought about it, no matter what he smelled, heard, or saw, he couldn't understand why he could only be part of their family if he was neutered.
“Was there really no way to join their family without being neutered?”
Chonk and Swish hadn't answered this question when they were back at the house.
So the little cat decided that he would find the answer on his own.
He would find the purpose of these "purls!"
Thus Toast, the little black cat, began his journey away from home.
The little black cat would continue on.
Epilogue
What the Little Black Cat Didn't Know - 1
It's been almost two weeks since Toast went missing.
I've done everything I can to find him. I asked the lady who feeds the strays to keep an eye out. I posted notices online and looked under every rock, leaving no stone unturned. I even resorted to using the scissors method—something I considered to be nothing more than superstition—to ask the land deity to talk to the tiger deity, who can communicate with cats; I've bribed the neighborhood strays with cans of food to spread the news. But it doesn't matter what I try, I still haven't found him.
Every day before I go to work and after I come home, I wait in front of my house, thinking I'll see Toast run across the street. I never want to come home, because that just means it was another day of not finding Toast.
Why did he take off so suddenly?
I don't know.
How could I have left an opening for him to escape?
I don't know.
Who am I supposed to blame?
I don't know.
Who in the world can help me?
I don't know.
Normally a cat like Toast wouldn't last outside more than a week, and I've been searching for nearly a month now.
Am I wasting my energy?
I didn't know.
I received an ad several days ago. It was the kind that recent college grads hand out by the train stations, and this one was for some cat café. I don't normally accept flyers, but I was drawn in by the young person passing them out. Flicking its tail beside him was a white cat. I could tell instantly that it was in a bad mood and thought it might take off any second, but it didn't. It let people pet it, squish it, and take pictures without objection. I even got down to take some pictures myself.
The Pet Whisper in the cat café
I know the people passing out flyers have some level of credibility, and since I've already tried every way I know how, I figure why not try something new as a last resort? I've got nothing to lose.
So I'm going to check it out tomorrow and find out if that so-called Pet Whisperer advertised on the café flyers is like those internet mediums, and see if she can help me ask Toast where he went.
I know I'm grasping at straws. I know people will try to comfort me by saying that I still have Chonk and Swish.
But I want to try. Just one last time.
I'm here at the café. I see a skinny girl. It's the pet medium, and also the store manager.
About us
- “A Book A Year” （一年一本游擊編輯組）is an independent publisher founded by writers in 2017. We believe publication can foster civic co-operation and participation. We hold meetings for writers to discuss, share, and refine writing and editorial skills.
- “Beware of Snip Snip, Black Cat”(Traditional Chinese) （小黑貓不想被剪蛋蛋 ）could be purchased from Books.com (https://www.books.com.tw/products/0010993452?sloc=main).
- We are looking for foreign publishers to work with.
Special thanks
- We thank Grace Najmulski (GNaj) for translating Chapter 1 from Chinese to English as the reading example. We also appreciate Grace's suggestion for translating the book title.
