人類學觀察 | 近距離接觸過的外來種生物之一 (中英對照)

在南非遇過不少中國人，有遇過好人、客氣的人，但遇過更多「沒想到他們跟台灣人差這麼多」的中國人，所以我稱他們為「外來種生物」，因為他們讓人難理解的程度常常出乎想像。把他們一一記錄下來分享，當作是一場人類文化學的田野觀察。

我初入職場的第一份工作是機場地勤，中國旅客在國外機場遇上同樣說中文的我都喜歡問「你是哪裡人?」。那天，那位男士聽了我回答「我是台灣人」，接下來在他開口前表情稍稍洩漏出一點鄙視時，我就該立即豎立起盾牌準備應戰。

「你們台灣幾十年來中文沒進步過!」他說。

我是個口拙的人，又不擅長與人正面衝突。當下我沉默以對，當作沒聽聞他自認有文化卻極其挑釁的態度。

一位善於與陌生人爭辯的友人說:「我就會回他:『總好過你們中國人讓中文退化吧? 中國會把繁體改成簡體是因為你們當年太多農民不識字，把字改簡單了是為了提高全民基本文化水平。』」

請問如果是你，你會如何應對?

I come across many Chinese in South Africa, some of them are nice and polite, but many more of them are 'unexpectedly-different-from-Taiwanese', so I call them 'the alien species'. The level of unbelievableness they cause are usually out of one's imagination. I would like to record each of them down like it's a field observation of cultural anthropology.

I was a check-in agent at an airport at my first job. The Chinese travellers like to ask me 'Where are you from?' when they noticed I also speak Mandarin. On that day, as soon as that man heard my reply saying 'I am a Taiwanese', I should have put up a shield preparing for a fight when he showed the subtle expression of despisement.

'The Mandarin in Taiwan has never been upgraded in decades!', he said.

I'm usually awkward in speech and not good in confrontation, so I decided to reply with silence and pretended I did not notice how provocative the comment was, even he thought he was very civilised.

A friend who is very good in confronting any strangers said, 'I would say to him, "Well, it is better than you, Chinese, downgraded Mandarin. Chinese government converted traditional writing to simplified beacuse there were too many illiterate farmers, so the purpose was to elevate the literacy level in the country"'.

How would you respond if it was you?