今á日咱beh來講ê主題是鬼。凡勢聽眾朋友ē想講，ĕ，kám是七月份iû-koh到--ah？Só͘-pái，goán mā teh tòe時行，beh來hâm ta̍k-ê講鬼，講mǹg-sǹg--ê，講魔神á，窮實lóng m̄是。M̄-chai各位kám bat注意過tī咱台語內底，尾字--ê是鬼ê形容詞實在有夠chē！咱今á日beh kéng 1 kóa khah心適--ê，來紹介hō͘ ta̍k-ê。
Sòa--lòe, koh有1部分ê kúi，是leh形容1 ê人ê行為，kāng款mā是teh kâng mē ê話。像講nā lóng m̄洗seng軀，衛生習慣真bái--ê，凡勢咱to̍h講伊是thái-ko鬼、lah-sap鬼、a-cha鬼án-ne。做人鹹koh澀，真凍霜--ê，咱to̍h講伊是乞食鬼。愛四界chhit-thô，風流ê人，to̍h叫伊風騷鬼。看tio̍h查某人to̍h beh kâng khoe，beh chhōe-khang-chhōe縫kâng khà油--ê，咱mā ē叫伊不死鬼。行路lóng無聲，害你oa̍t頭hiông-hiông去ho͘ chhoah-1-tiô--ê，to̍h ē hông mē講是mo͘h壁鬼。有ê人做人真卑鄙，來到咱chia to̍h講咱kah意聽ê話，去到in hia，to̍h講in hia聽tio̍h ē歡喜ê話，對2 pêng lóng bē忠，kan-na beh顧看ka-tī有好khang--ê thang thio無，chit lō人，咱to̍h講伊是雙面刀鬼，nā知影有人是chit款--ê，咱千萬m̄-thang ka信táu。Nā講做tāi-chì欠考慮，燥性koh chhóng-pōng，咱to̍h講伊是青狂鬼。人nā án-ne歹chhèng-chhèng，惡khia̍k-khia̍k，咱ē講伊歹鬼鬼。
咱mā ē-tàng用kah鬼有關係ê 1 kóa詞來做句，像講：「你免tī hia leh假鬼假怪，奸奸鬼鬼，最近公司ê機密，去hō͘對手ê公司the̍h--tio̍h，你免怪我leh疑神疑鬼，我想，一定是你leh內神通外鬼！」
最後，咱來講1 kóa m̄是leh講人ê行為ê鬼。Gín-á時，歇熱hit-tang-chūn，走去海邊á sńg kui e晡，到厝to̍h ē去hông唸講：「叫你日頭khah軟lio̍h--eh chiah去sńg，lóng講m̄聽，你看！曝kah án-ne烏鬼鬼，皮膚ē受傷neh！」Nah有法度！Gín-á人有水thang sńg，nah擋ē tiâu。Koh有hit款專門teh藏水ê兵á，海龍hit款--ê，台灣話to̍h hō做水鬼á，藏水bī專門teh穿ê衫，to̍h hō-chò水鬼á衫。活鬼m̄是鬼koh活--leh ŏ͘，活鬼是1種自動機關，親像有ê尪á，發條ka chūn-chūn--leh，ē ka-tī tín-tāng，he to̍h是用活鬼--ê，koh有1種音樂kheh-á，choān發條to̍h ē演奏1條歌hit款，mā ē-tàng講是用活鬼--ê。
Kin-á-ji̍t lán beh lâi kóng ê chú-tê sī “kúi”. Hoān-sè thiaⁿ-chiòng pêng-iú ē siūⁿ kóng, ĕ, kám sī 7 goe̍h-hūn iû-koh kàu--ah? Só͘-pái, goán mā teh tòe sî-kiâⁿ,beh lâi hâm ta̍k-ê kóng kúi, kóng mǹg-sǹg--ê, kóng mô͘-sîn-á,khêng-si̍t lóng m̄ sī. M̄-chai kok-ūi kám bat chù-ì kòe tī lán Tâi-gí lāi-té, bóe jī--ê sī kúi ê hêng-iông sû si̍t-chāi ū kàu chē! Lán kin-á-ji̍t beh kéng 1 kóa khah sim-sek--ê, lâi siāu-kài hō͘ ta̍k-ê.
Lán Tâi-gí chhiāⁿ-chhiāⁿ ē tī 1 ê miâ-sû āu-piah koh ke kóng 1 jī kúi, lâi hêng-iông bó͘-mih lâng tùi 1 kiāⁿ tāi-chì chin hèng, he têng-tō͘ koh tōa-tōa chhiau-kòe it-poaⁿ ê lâng. Chhiūⁿ kóng kiáu-kúi, chiú-kúi, chîⁿ-kúi, sâi-chia̍h-kúi chit khoán--ê, chhiūⁿ chit-lō ōe, it poaⁿ sī teh mē--lâng-ê, to̍h m̄-thang tng lâng ê bīn kóng ē khah hó! “Iau kúi ké sè-jī” kóng--tio̍h ê iau kúi, mā sī kāng chit lūi ê sû, bêng-bêng to̍h chiok sâi-chia̍h, koh tī hia teh kóng ”Bián--lah! Bián--lah!” Kî-si̍t ta̍k-ê ê sim-lāi lóng chai-chai--leh hó--bô, koh ké to̍h bô sêng--ā!
Sòa--lòe, koh ū 1 pō͘-hūn ê kúi, sī leh hêng-iông 1 ê lâng ê hêng-ûi, kāng khoán mā sī teh kâng mē ê ōe. Chhiūⁿ kóng nā lóng m̄ sé seng-khu, ōe-seng si̍p-koàn chin bái--ê, hoān-sè lán to̍h kóng i sī thái-ko-kúi, lah-sap-kúi, a-cha-kúi án-ne. Chò lâng kiâm koh siap, chin tàng-sng--ê, lán to̍h kóng i sī khit-chia̍h-kúi. Ài sì-kè chhit-thô, hong-liû ê lâng, to̍h kiò i hong-so-kúi. Khòaⁿ tio̍h cha-bó͘ lâng to̍h beh kâng khoe, beh chhōe-khang-chhōe-phāng kâng khà-iû--ê, lán mā kiò i put-sú-kúi. Kiâⁿ-lō͘ lóng bô siaⁿ, hāi lí oa̍t-thâu hiông-hiông khì ho͘ chhoah-1-tiô--ê, to̍h ē hông mē kóng sī mo͘h-piah-kúi. Ū ê lâng chò lâng chin pi-phí, lâi kàu lán chia to̍h kóng lán kah-ì thiaⁿ ê ōe, khì kàu in hia, to̍h kóng in hia thiaⁿ tio̍h ē hoaⁿ-hí ê ōe, tùi 2 pêng lóng bē tiong, kan-na beh kò͘ khòaⁿ ka-tī ū hó-khang--ê thang thio bô, chit-lō lâng, lán to̍h kóng i sī siang-bīn-to-kúi, nā chai-iáⁿ ū lâng sī chit khoán--ê, lán chhian-bān m̄-thang ka sìn-táu. Nā kóng chò tāi-chì khiàm khó-lū, sò-sèng koh chhóng-pōng, lán to̍h kóng i sī chheⁿ-kông-kúi. Lâng nā án-ne pháiⁿ-chhèng-chhèng, ok-khia̍k-khia̍k, lán ē kóng i pháiⁿ-kúi-kúi.
Lán mā ē-tàng iōng kah kúi ū koan-hē ê 1 kóa sû lâi chò kù, chhiūⁿ kóng:” Lí bián tī hia leh ké-kúi-ké-koài, kan-kan-kúi-kúi, chòe-kīn kong-si ê ki-bi̍t, khì hō͘ tùi-chhiú ê kong-si the̍h--tio̍h, lí bián koài góa leh gî-sîn-gî-kúi, góa siūⁿ, it-tēng sī lí leh lāi sîn thong gōa kúi!”
Chòe-āu, lán lâi kóng 1 kóa m̄ sī leh kóng lâng ê hêng-ûi ê kúi. Gín-á sî, hioh-joa̍h hit-tang-chun, cháu khì hái-piⁿ-á sńg kui e-po͘, kàu chhù to̍h ē khì hông liām kóng:” Kiò lí ji̍t-thâu khah nńg lio̍h--eh chiah khì sńg, lóng kóng m̄ thiaⁿ, lí khòaⁿ! Pha̍k kah án-ne o͘-kúi-kúi, phôe-hu ē siū-siong neh!” Nah ū hoat-tō͘! Gín-á lâng ū chúi thang sńg, nah tòng ē tiâu. Koh ū hit khoán choan-bûn teh chhàng-chúi ê peng-á, Hái-lêng hit khoán--ê, Tâi-oân-ōe to̍h hō chò chúi-kúi-á, chhàng-chúi-bī choan-bûn teh chhēng ê saⁿ, to̍h hō-chò chúi-kúi-á-saⁿ. Oa̍h-kúi m̄ sī kúi koh oa̍h--leh ŏ, oa̍h-kúi sī 1 chióng chū-tōng ki-koan, chhin-chhiūⁿ ū ê ang-á, hoa̍t-tiâu ka chūn-chūn--leh, ē ka-tī tín-tāng, he to̍h sī iōng oa̍h-kúi--ê, koh ū 1 chióng im-ga̍k kheh-á, choān hoat-tiâu to̍h ē ián-chàu 1 tiâu koa hit khoán, mā ē-tàng kóng sī iōng oa̍h-kúi--ê.
