When I first began my teachings it was obvious to me that because I understood the nature of the Projector that it would take along time to be able to develop the kinds of tools that I could offer immediately to Generators. Basically, the first seven to ten years that I worked in Human Design I focused almost exclusively on Generators. They are an essential part of the life force of this planet. If they can wake up it helps everything else wake up.
At the same time, over and over again as I went through my process of introducing Human Design and doing opening evening lectures, it was always so clear to me that I was short changing Projectors, because I didn’t have an easy fix for them. I didn’t have an easy fix for them at all. All Projectors know that. They know that strategy is an interesting concept. But it’s not as if it’s something that you taste all the time.
There’s something that’s very difficult. What is difficult is that the Human Design process is so deeply personal. It’s so deeply individual. It really is. And it’s very lonely, in that sense. You are alone with a very different way of approaching the nature of being. That aloneness is something that can be very uncomfortable. And it can be uncomfortable in the sense of, “Where am I going? Am I in the right direction? Is this really working for me?”
Of course, when you think about the nature of the Generator or the energy type, that is not a dilemma. That is not a dilemma in the sense that there is this constant potential to be able to deal with the nature of being through your strategy. But it’s not the case for a Projector. It’s not the case at all.
You can be invited to enter into a certain career when you are young, and the invitation is correct. And if the response to the invitation is correct then you enter into something that is correct for you. But it doesn’t mean that everything in that will be. It doesn’t mean that everyone you’re going to meet on that track will be. And it doesn’t mean that all of them will invite you to make up your mind about them, or about their impact on you.
The fact of the matter is that being a Projector means that you have an absolute drive within you to integrate with the other; it’s simply there. It’s not so much there in the sense that there is a neediness as there is an enormous curiosity. It’s really one of the deepest themes that operates through Projector, is this extraordinary curiosity. And it’s not a curiosity that is always self-evident in the way in which their Personalities operate. It is a curiosity that is fundamentally a part of the way their aura works. No other aura has this facility to penetrate to the self, or to the identity of the other. It is the Projector’s great gift, this dichotomy of being gifted in recognizing and being here to be recognized.
Yet, the difficulty, the dilemma from the beginning, from the moment that the Projector comes out of the womb is the dilemma of the conditioning field. It’s absolutely essential to take in the conditioning and it gets to a point where it’s very, very difficult, extremely difficult to be able to differentiate between the not-self of what I am because this is how I’ve been conditioned and the true self; it’s not easy.
More than that, when I began my process and focused on Generators it was natural because they are naturally curious about themselves. This is not the case for Projectors, it’s secondary.
The interest of all Projectors is the fulfillment of what their Design is about which is to fulfill that curiosity, to be able to recognize and see how things work; and yet, while they’re doing that they are dependent on the other.
What I’m going to share with you is a discerning tool. It’s the ability to begin to grasp the impact of others on you in a way in which you can see what is healthy for you and what is not healthy for you. This is something that is so essential. Everything about what it is to be a Projector is about who is in your life. Everything. This is not about they’re important and you’re not. This is simply about the reality; you need something to be curious with. It is part of the process. You need those beings in order to recognize, and ultimately to be recognized. Yet, what they do to you is very, very difficult to actually grasp. Oh yes, there are some obvious things. If you’re unemotional and you’re dealing with an emotional person or you’ve got an open Spleen and you’re dealing with a Splenic person, and all of these things that we know.
But in fact, that doesn’t really tell you whether to be conditioned by them is valuable or not. As a Projector, conditioning is part of your life. It’s what you’re here to experience. It’s part of the way in which you taste and explore what the other is. It’s something so important. Yet, it has to be the right beings. And yet, how do you know?