笑顔...

毎日笑顔で、何事にも笑顔で臨むように自分に言い聞かせてください。常に笑顔でなければ、グループに溶け込むことができません。無意識のうちに、作り笑いになっています。本当は笑いたくないのに、（クラスメイトにうっかり怪我をされて）それでも笑ってしまう。笑顔がめんどくさい… 心から出た笑顔はほとんどなく、お世辞や媚びた笑顔がほとんどですが、心の底から笑顔になることを考えてきました。 . 本当に…難しい…疲れた…本当に疲れた…。

I smile every day for every single thing, and I have to smile all the time! Certainly... I have to smile all the time, but I don't realize that the fake smile on my face has become a "necessity" for me every day. I clearly don't want to smile, and I still have that self-centered smile, but I've been hurt (by a classmate) and I don't care about smiling, it's not related, I hate smiling... Most of the smiles I've seen are genuine, but most are flattering, even though my smile isn't genuine, but I want to smile all the time!!! Really...really...it's hard...I'm sorry...I'm sorry!

每天都掛著微笑做每一件事，一直告訴自己要微笑面對所有的事喔!一定一定.....要一直微笑，只有笑著才能融入群體...不知不覺間臉上那抹虛偽的微笑成了我每天的"必需品"明明很不想笑卻還是維持著那噁心的笑容，就算是被打到(同學打鬧誤傷)還是笑著說沒關係，笑容好討厭.....我所看到的很少是真正發自內心，大多是討好、諂媚的笑容，雖然我的笑容也不是發自內心，但我有想過要發自內笑啊!!!真的...真的...好難...我累了...我真的累了!