Experiencing

I'm suffering

I'm not living, just surviving

I'm right in the core of the fire of hell that is hard to jump out

Or turn to something, someone to help find my destination, perfect position for me, my ultimate goals, my dream lifestyle, and expected shape of myself

It's all about experience

I'm feeling it, experiencing it through every courses of life that I, greedily yet desperately, am eager to enrich, as fulfilled as possible 

I don't know what would happen to me next even though I've prepared, predicted, and planned in advance 

But whatever occurs, I just feel it, embrace it and intergrate with it

During this wholeness of escapade and hardship

I can only grow from them and become more like myself and have the capability of handling obstacles while encountering them if any happens

I assume as such turbulent times passes, I can finally be led into the process of reliving, recalling, reviewing, reminiscing those experiences that contain chaos, ravelment, defilements, ominousness and roughness

I gain experiences through every single moments, bad ones or good ones, sometimes more like expected ones

So I can hopefully

become one that is full of roundness and with a story