I've had back pain for most of my life
背痛伴隨我大部分的人生
And the most I ever did was see the doc
我所能做的就是去看醫生
And the doc told me that my back was alright
醫生告訴我說我的背沒事
He had initials in his shirt, he had a nice expensive watch
他的袍子上繡著名字縮寫,手腕上戴著高級名錶
I thought he knew what he was doing or at least what was right
我想他應該知道自己在幹嘛,或至少他說的是對的
He made me fill a piece of paper out with different questions all about
他讓我填了一份表格,上頭有各種不同的問題
My health, wellbeing, and the state of my life
關於我的健康、身心和生活狀態
I told the truth, I'm only lying to myself if I should lie
我實話實說,如果我說謊,我也只是在對自己說謊
So, I answered everything and did my best to keep it real
所以,我如實回答,盡可能誠實地寫下
In between the lines
字句間真實的我
I gave it back to him
寫好後我拿給他
He took his time and read the paper over once or twice
他慢慢地讀了一遍或兩遍
He looked at me as if to say "I need to tell you something
然後看著我說道: 「我必須告訴你
And don't prepare for me to tell you something nice"
我接下來要說的並不是些好話」
He wanted to know just how much I tend to drink and smoke
他想要了解我到底喝多少酒、抽多少菸
I told him, how it was and then he gave me this advice
我告訴了他,而他給了我一些建議
He said, "Ease up on stress, you don't help yourself much
他說: 「放下壓力,你現在這樣對自己幫助不大
It's too intense for you to take, you'll only tense up"
這麼多壓力讓你吃不消,只會使你愈來愈緊繃
And you see you have these issues and you struggle to relax"
你看看,壓力對你造成這麼多毛病,讓你沒辦法好好放鬆
So you come see me the doctor to get something for your back"
你來看醫生是希望能治好背痛
But this piece of paper tells me that there's more that you should address"
但從這張紙看來,你有更深層的問題需要解決
I see some anger in you, plus addiction, plus the rest"
我發現你內心存在憤怒,還有各種成癮,再加上其他有的沒的
I feel like we should speak about this for it comes first"
我認為我們應該談談這些,他們才是首要的問題
And I know a lot of people who can help for what it's worth"
我認識許多人可以幫助你處理這些更重要的問題」
I said
我說
"I don't know if you understand man my back just fucking hurts"
「我不知道你是不是能理解,我的背就是他媽的超痛
Do I need physiotherapy? Or is this something worse?
我是需要做物理治療嗎? 還是有什麼更糟糕的問題?
He paused and then he asked me what I thought we should do
他停頓了一下,接著問我我認為該怎麼做
I said "If I knew that I wouldn't be here man I'm asking you"
我說: 「要是我知道,我就不會坐在這問你了,老兄」
He handed me to someone who gave me a blood test
他讓我去找另一個人做血檢
Who handed me to someone else
那個人讓我去找下個人
Who took my payment and took all of my fucking patience
那個人跟我收診療費,磨光了我他媽所有耐心
I should add at this point the doctor had already left
我還必須補充,那位醫生早就不知道跑哪去了
And I resented that man, I never went back to him again
我憎恨那個醫生,從此沒有再回去找過他
Well you know in a weird way I feel like maybe he was right
好吧,我感覺某方面來說,他或許是對的
I may be using my back pain to distract from the pain of life
或許,我一直在用背痛掩飾生活的痛苦
Feel it all externally, when really it's just inside
用外在的痛來麻痺內在的痛
Procrastinating, confrontation, every single time
不斷地拖延,而不去面對
So thank you, Mr. Doctor man I'm now being sincere
所以,謝謝你,醫生先生,現在我誠實的面對自我
I guess I just didn't wanna hear what I didn't wanna hear, okay
我想之前我就是不想聽到我不想聽到的,好吧
(歌詞翻譯 by Feina)