【言談日常】《懼胖社會》中英閱讀心得

這本書在台北時間2024/08/03買了，我花了一整個晚上把它讀完，這本書的很多經歷都跟我很像，所以這本書對我來說蠻有共鳴的。

I bought this book on August 3rd, 2024, Taipei time, and I spent the entire night reading it. Many of the experiences described in this book are similar to mine, so it resonated deeply with me.

其中看到胖女人在性吸引力的困擾，我深刻的認為有很強大的共鳴，於是我找到作者Kate Manne的連絡方式，我們相談甚歡，我跟她分享我在這方面的心得。我說：

When I read about the struggles of plus-sized women with sexual attractiveness, I felt a strong connection. I found the contact information for the author, Kate Manne, and we had a great conversation. I shared my thoughts on this topic with her, and I said:

「有些人問我，我現在在社會關係上獲得『第一階段的勝利』——交到很要好的好朋友，被異性和同性告白和約會，有性生活，開始有尊重我的人，開始喜歡自己，開始有勇氣解決自己和任何人的煩惱。可是我看起來沒有覺得好像解脫的樣子，究竟為什麼？」

"Some people ask me, now that I've achieved the 'first stage of victory' in social relationships—making close friends, being confessed to and dating by both men and women, having a sex life, starting to be respected by others, starting to like myself, and having the courage to solve my own and others' problems—why don't I seem to feel liberated? What's the reason?"

「我說，這些事情，乍看之下好像是我只要想要就可以得到的東西，但是這些東西，是需要我透過爭取才能得到的——換言之，這些東西在我漫長的人生裡，並不像一般人所想的，這是理所當然就能得到的；相較來說，如果我們不爭取，可能永遠沒有辦法得到一般人的生活，可能就永遠都是『人生輸家』，而我們的努力被視為一種勵志範本讓大家做榜樣。但事實上，我們不想當誰的榜樣，我們只想擁有一般人本來就能擁有的權利。如果一群人必須要透過爭取才能得到平常人擁有的東西，那其實代表什麼呢？特別是當我們努力過後，被社會荒誕卻又理所當然的『封聖』為一種『社會聖人』，究竟是真的被看得起？還是因為社會本身不公平，才透過『封聖』讓我們被認可是『社會聖人』讓這種不公平延續下去？」

"I explained that these things, which might seem easily attainable at first glance, were actually something I had to fight for—meaning that these things were not naturally granted to me in my long life, unlike what many people assume. In contrast, if we don't fight for them, we might never achieve what is considered a 'normal' life, and we might forever remain 'losers in life.' Our efforts are then seen as inspirational examples for others to follow. But in reality, we don't want to be anyone's role model; we just want to have the rights that everyone else naturally has. If a group of people has to fight for things that others take for granted, what does that say? Especially when, after our efforts, society absurdly and self-righteously 'canonizes' us as 'social saints,' are we truly being respected, or is this an attempt to perpetuate the unfairness by recognizing us as 'saints'?"

然後這些人就沉默了。我不知道他們的沉默是什麼意思，但是當我講出這句話時，他們確實啞口無言。

Then these people fell silent. I don't know what their silence meant, but when I said this, they were indeed speechless.

我想這應該是普遍瘦子和胖女人最大的不同。瘦子會認為，我目前既然力圖振作，應該覺得圓滿了，但我並不這麼認為。我想即使我在社會關係上取得全面勝利，這種想法應該還是種在我心裡，這不是我天生愛抱怨，而是無論我看起來勵不勵志，都不應該讓這個問題被淡化。

I think this might be the biggest difference between slim people and plus-sized women. Slim people may think that now that I've tried to pull myself together, I should feel fulfilled, but I don't see it that way. I believe that even if I achieve total victory in social relationships, this thought will still be planted in my heart. It's not that I am inherently inclined to complain, but rather that, regardless of whether I am seen as inspirational, this issue should not be downplayed.

有些同樣是胖女人的KOL，也是宣傳著「愛自己」、「有自信」、「自我提升」是解決問題的萬靈丹，特別是跟我一樣是身心靈同業的胖女人KOL，也是會很生氣的反駁我的觀點，認為我們只要善用吸引力法則，愛自己，進而提升自己，讓自己變得更好，讓社會因為我們的努力尊重我們，這樣怎麼會是一個問題呢？

Some plus-sized women KOLs also advocate that 'loving oneself,' 'being confident,' and 'self-improvement' are the panacea for solving these problems. Particularly those in the same mind-body-spirit industry as me, some may strongly rebut my views, arguing that as long as we make good use of the law of attraction, love ourselves, and improve ourselves, society will respect us for our efforts. How can this be a problem?

但實際上，在資本主義下的靈性思考，究竟是否能應用在確實被社會壓迫的胖女人身上？

But in reality, can spiritual thinking under capitalism truly be applied to plus-sized women who are indeed oppressed by society?

原因是因為，我們的社會，依照每個人的外形，分類有哪些外形是值得被愛、被關心的；但有些人的外形，可能天生很難獲得其他人的關心，我們必須要花更多時間在關心自己身上，而同時我們又要分出更多心力關心那些本身就不缺乏關心的人。

The reason is that our society categorizes people based on their appearance, determining which looks are worthy of love and care. But some people's appearance may make it inherently difficult to receive concern from others, forcing us to spend more time caring for ourselves while also expending more effort to care for those who are not lacking in care.

如果是這樣的話，所謂的「愛自己」對這些外形的人來說，是不是公平的事情呢？當然也更不用說，所謂的「吸引力法則」究竟能不能適用在被社會拋棄的外形？

If that's the case, is the concept of 'loving oneself' fair to people with certain appearances? Not to mention, can the so-called 'law of attraction' really apply to those whose appearance society has discarded?

我目前學占卜也才五個月的時間，我在這段期間幫助了所有人，但是面臨極端案例時，我並不會像其他身心靈家，會重複說著「愛自己」或「吸引力法則」之類的東西。假如個案一直活在有毒的環境，那他們會一蹶不振不是很正常嗎？我們的社會過於叫絕望的人力挽狂瀾，然後說這是勵志；如果他們沒辦法振作，他們還會嫌這個人不長進，而不會去思考整體大環境如何影響個案，那這是不是一件很過分的事情？

I’ve only been studying divination for five months now, and during this period, I’ve helped everyone. However, when facing extreme cases, I don’t repeat phrases like 'love yourself' or 'law of attraction' like other mind-body-spirit practitioners. If someone is stuck in a toxic environment, isn't it normal for them to be unable to bounce back? Our society puts too much pressure on the hopeless to turn their lives around and calls this inspirational; if they can't pull through, they’re seen as not making progress. But no one thinks about how the larger environment affects individuals. Isn’t this a terribly unfair thing?

所以我覺得，這本書不止可以釐清胖體歧視的問題，同時也能側面思考，弱勢的環境是如何形成的。

So, I believe this book not only clarifies the issue of sizeism but also offers a perspective on how marginalized environments are formed.

當然我認為，這本書對廣泛瘦子，以及認同瘦身文化的人來說，應該是沒有辦法共情的，因為他們沒有能力思考到這件事。

Of course, I think this book might not resonate with the general slim population or those who identify with slimming culture, as they may not have the capacity to think about this issue.

所以我推薦所有對瘦身文化質疑的人閱讀這位教授的書。但如果你不同意，那我們也尊重你的想法。

Therefore, I recommend this professor's book to anyone who questions slimming culture. But if you disagree, we respect your opinion as well.